"I still cannot comprehend the lack of care that I received from the midwives at OUH after I had given birth

A mother's experience of Oxford University Hospitals Maternity Services in 2005:

I gave birth in 2005. To this day I still cannot comprehend the lack of care that I received from the midwives at OUH after I had given birth.

Curt, abrupt, dismissive and just plain rude. At one of the most vulnerable moments in your life you expect and should receive better.

On admittance I was already 10cm dilated and felt rushed into a decision about having an epidural. The birth wasn’t easy, the epidural left me with no feeling in my lower body so I had to be told when to push. My attempts were ineffective and I had to have an episiotomy quickly - my baby was in distress and her heart rate became very low. I lost 4 pints of blood in the process and had to stay in hospital for blood transfusions.

On the second day it became apparent that I was suffering from a severe post-dural puncture headache. I simply could not sit up without extraordinary head pain. Here was where the lack of care became particularly apparent. Without an inch of sympathy I was told quite simply I would have to lay down for the next day or so and see if it went away, all the while trying to feed my newborn baby and wanting to hold her.

I was dismissed early on in being shown how to breastfeed because I had to remain lying down and was promptly brought bottled milk so that my husband could feed our baby. I will always remember one morning I spent alone struggling to function while the breastfeeding team spent hours with the woman next to me trying to get her to breastfeed more effectively.

It became apparent after one night of having blood transfusions (when my baby was taken away and fed by ONE kind nurse) that my PDPH was not going away and so I had to have an epidural blood patch. I know this happening is simply bad luck but I always remember a midwife telling me that the anaesthetist was ‘very disappointed with himself because this hadn’t happened for many years.’

Oh won’t somebody think of the anaesthetist’s feelings? Shame on me for blemishing his record.

Thankfully the blood patch worked and all I had to do was have a bowel motion before I could be discharged and I lied and said I had. I can’t tell you how glad I was to go home.

My story doesn’t come close to most here and on reflection being older and wiser now I should have protested and made more of a fuss but hindsight is a marvellous thing .

Over the last 20 years my experience of nurses has been limited to smear tests and when I see how caring these nurses are in comparison to the midwives I had it just leaves me appalled.

Women giving birth deserve better. They deserve THE BEST CARE.

Thank you for this opportunity to be heard, I really do appreciate it.