"What happened to me was not just neglectful — it was inhumane."

A mother’s experience of Oxford University Hospitals Maternity Services in 2022:

I gave birth to my daughter at John Radcliffe Hospital in September 2022. What should have been a precious and joyful time turned into one of the most traumatic experiences of my life. I had a C-section, and my daughter was taken to the NICU for 24 hours. No one came to update me, and no one offered to take me to see her. I was left in my hospital bed, desperate for news, frightened, and alone.

My brother — not the hospital staff — had to arrange a wheelchair, physically lift me into it despite my fresh surgical wound, and carry my catheter while wheeling me to my daughter. A healthcare assistant stood by and simply watched. That moment broke me — I felt abandoned and dehumanised. When my daughter and I were later moved to the postnatal ward because she had jaundice, I was told we would need to stay several days.

Those five days felt like five days of hell. I had no support with my recovery, and no one seemed to care about how I or my baby were doing. My calls for help were ignored time and again.

One night, I noticed my baby’s breathing didn’t seem right. I pressed the call button, terrified, but no one came for around 15 minutes. In pain and panic, I forced myself out of bed despite my stitches and finally found someone. When they checked her, her observations were abnormal, and her temperature was too low. I was told to hold her skin-to-skin and that a doctor would come in about an hour — but no one came.

I pressed the call button again an hour later, then again at 5 a.m., and still no one came. At 7 a.m., a nurse told me off harshly for not putting her back under the phototherapy lights, even though no one had told me to. Her tone was cruel and left me feeling like I had failed my baby, when in truth, I had been completely failed by the staff.

Another upsetting incident happened when one nurse took a blood sample from my baby’s heel to check her jaundice levels, and then half an hour later another nurse came to take another. When I explained a test had already been done, she accused me of obstructing their investigations. It was only when another mother on the ward intervened and confirmed she had seen the first test that the nurse left to check. I was humiliated and made to feel like a nuisance instead of a mother trying to protect her child.

The worst moment came one night around 2 a.m. I was in severe pain from my C-section and needed to go to the toilet. My baby was crying uncontrollably, and I pressed the call button — but again, no one came. I waited as long as I could, then tried to get up myself, feeling my stitches pull painfully. I didn’t make it in time and soiled myself. I cannot express the shame and despair I felt in that moment. I was exhausted, in pain, and completely alone. When I went to the bathroom to clean myself, someone came in and cancelled the call button, but no one ever returned to check on me.

These experiences have left deep emotional scars. I felt invisible and worthless at a time when I was most vulnerable. I have struggled ever since with feelings of guilt, trauma, and mistrust towards healthcare professionals.

What happened to me was not just neglectful — it was inhumane. I understand that staff can be busy and under pressure, but there is no excuse for leaving a new mother in pain, distress, and humiliation for hours on end.

The lack of compassion and basic care I received has left me heartbroken.