"I said I wanted to give him formula instead. They told me I was not allowed"

A mother’s experience of Oxford University Hospitals Maternity Services in 2022:

I had my baby in summer 2022. At my due date midwife appointment I requested to explore the option of an elective C-section because my baby was measuring very big on scans and was now at term.

I was told it wouldn't be discussed because having a C-section would stop me bonding with my baby.

When he was born two weeks late, I had a 3b tear due to his size. I believe this could have been avoided. - when in labour, I told numerous medical staff involved that my cannula was extremely painful and asked them to check it. None of them did, instead telling me that was part of having a cannula.

Eventually a consultant checked it and said it needed to be removed immediately. My hand ended up very swollen and I was unable to move it properly for a weeks. It prevented me from picking up my baby after he was born.

My son was born around the time of the 40 degree heatwave. All blinds in the bay were closed permanently to manage the heat. When my son was identified as having jaundice, midwives told me to stand at the end of the bay and hold him up to a crack of light between the blinds to help him. This was despite me having had stitches for a tear and being barely able to stand.

They would not allow my son to be taken outside as an alternative and said I could not have a bay/room with windows. Instead they checked his jaundice levels at regular intervals, kept confirming the level was increasing and blamed me for this for "not feeding him properly".

I told midwives in the hospital I no longer wanted to breastfeed. This was in part because they were saying I was not doing it properly and that this was making my baby unwell. I said I wanted to give him formula instead. They told me I was not allowed to stop and instead I had to pump. I expressed this routine was making me feel miserable but was not listened to. I had no voice.

I put in a complaint about my experience and received a defensive response, blaming all issues on me.

After my experience at the John Radcliffe hospital, I have made the decision not to have any more children. I cannot go through that again.